[Flash Fiction] Brotherly Bonding

“Left…left…left, right,” Daniel chanted like a drill sergeant as he and his younger brother diligently pedaled their two-seater bicycle up and down the park trail.

“Shut…shut…shut up,” Derrick mocked. “Man, this is so embarrassing.”

“Which is why I want us to finish our laps before anyone we know sees us,” Daniel retorted over his shoulder. “So stop your lazy-hole whining and pedal.”

“Why don’t you fix your pretentious face first?” Derrick shot back. “It’s your fault mom’s making us do this stupid bike thing anyway!”

My fault?”

“Yeah, your fault, snotface!”

“Shut it, douchehole!” The front tire wobbled as Daniel lost control of the handlebar and both brothers and bicycle crashed onto the ground. A squeal of laughter erupted from nearby. The brothers turned to find their little sister giggling, her hands gripping the phone recording the evidence of their punishment for their mother.

“That’s what you two get for playing a mean prank on me!” Mina stuck her tongue out. “Mommy said 50 laps!”

Grumbling, the brothers dusted off the bicycle and started again.

© Jade M. Wong 2017


Photo: Dorothy

Written for Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers. Word Count: 175 exactly!

I tried to get creative with the insults while keeping it relatively curse-word free. It made me curious though—do you guys have any creative name-calling insults without actually using vulgar or curse words?

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54 thoughts on “[Flash Fiction] Brotherly Bonding

  1. Snotface has to be the best insult I’ve ever encountered. There is a meme of the cartoon batman insulting someone by calling them a six-piece chicken mcnobody, and I thought that was pretty great. Curse free insults are the best and your story made me laugh.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. The best part is, I can imagine both my brother and I do EXACTLY the same thing. In fact, I think we’ve probably done it before 😀 You’ve captured the spirit of bickering perfectly, for a light-hearted weekday read.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Hehe. That’ll teach the boys. I’ll bet they’re more careful around their sister after THAT humiliation. That’s a smart mom.

    For insults, you could always use British ones that folks aren’t familiar with. You could call someone a wanker, a pikey, a punter, or a bloody cur. You could go with Yiddish and call someone a putz. These are all foul language where they come from, but here, they just sound foreign. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  4. lol, great form of punishment. Gets them off there video games and cunning plans but also gives them great exercise, punishes them for tricking their sister, and teaches them how to work together as a team well riding the bike.

    Smart mother!

    Liked by 1 person

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